Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Class is Lost

I was always raised to be an exemplary person. Hold doors for ladies, 'yes sir' 'no ma'am', 'two lumps with milk?', but today you just don't find many people who have any sort of manners. For instance, people in my classes, they yawn with their mouths wide open, no hand covering them, they talk when others are presenting (even when the professor is teaching) and I'm not talking about whispering, they straight up talk, and there are those people who just do everything in a personal and selfish manner. I'm not a snob, but do lets try to walk on the right side of the walkway, or not eat with your mouth open at a table in public. No one wants to see you masticate.

Fraggot is always getting onto me about this. He says that I'm too old fashioned, that I should just understand that people these days don't really care how others percieve them, and (the ultimate issue for him) I should stop my bitching because it is equally as rude. I think my bitching is just an unfortunate reaction of being well bred around rude people, and that it is as unavoidable as catching a cold from someone yawning or coughing without covering their mouth (see, there are reasons one does this).

But maybe I should try to give up my discomfort with rudeness. Perhaps I should just try to let myself slip into the murky waters of uncultured-ness and slide along with the others who live their days as sloppy messes.

I think not!

Friday, March 19, 2010

Puppy Dog Eyes

Oh the horny world of college gays. I myself have never been a very horny person. I don't think its a sign of being well bred. Granted of course I have had many moments when I fancied hooking-up with a guy, but I've never run around to guys of all sorts looking for someone to sleep with, or dressing like a tramp to attract guys for sex. Unfortunately however, living in a small city, running into this type is unavoidable. So, I finally got Fraggot to go to the gay bar. We were sitting in a corner at a table, he had his arm around me, and I was sort of cozied into him. We very much looked like a respectable couple of any sorts just out for a night of fun, and time to be together. When up bounces this freshman looking, tramped up boy, ass tight jeans on, shirt sort of lifted to above his belly button showing off his abs (oh how I hate that other people have abs!!). I knew what was coming for my poor Fraggot. This little, poorly bred boy, jumped over to our table and sat, SAT right next to Fraggot and put his face right up to his. Smiling with puppy dog eyes and breathing alcoholic breath all over us, he started hitting on Fraggot. I looked over with raised eye brows (the queen was rising in my chest lol) and looked at him. Fraggot very calmly and nicely explained that he was in a rather committed relationship with me. The boy finally looked over at me. "Ohhhhh... with him? But you're sooo hot". The boy looked up at Fraggot, leaned in and kissed him. Before I could even take in a sharp breath to let out on this boy, Fraggot jumped up and pushed him to the floor. "Dude, I told you, I'm with him. I am not looking for a trashy, littly queen to run around with. So take you're little, immature ass and get OUT of my boyfriend's space".

Now, if you're reading this and you're not gay, let me tell you, most fights in gay bars are handled by screaming queens, with very fem voices and very gay choices of words. So, with my boyfriends strong, manly voice (lol) everyone stopped and looked. The boy was on the ground, and as a dutifull queen, broke into hysterical sobs. Fraggot looked around, sat next to me, put his arm around me, looked back at the boy, and then pulled me into one of the most passionate kisses we've had out of bed haha. The queens at the bar started to clap and cheer, shouting out some nasty things. When the boy walked over to the bar the queens just laughed at him. Paying the bill at the bar that night, Fraggot got some compliments for his handling of the situation, and I got a few jealous remarks from guys who would just love to have a Fraggot like mine.

Special night. Rates high on my list of favorite nights of my life.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Jumping Ahead is NEVER a Good Thing

So, going back to school is always hard after vacation. ESPECIALLY when your first day comes right after day light savings. I've never understood why we continue to torture ourselves with that mess. I mean, we're not doing it for usable daylight hours to work in dimly lit factories anymore, and the excuse that it saves energy is laughable, while most of us keep lights, fans, tvs, computers, and a plethora of otherthings running all day long, in rooms we don't visit. So lets just all vote to end day light savings. Well, we can keep the falling back one I guess. Though that does make the jumping forward one necessary doesn't it? Well, anywho. This whole time change thing wrecked my day.

Waking up to a fresh cup of coffee right before heading into work is one of life's little bright spots for me. There are two conditions to it happening though. Notice I said "waking up to", that requires someone to have made it for me. While my mother doesn't live with me, that naturally leaves... you guessed it, the one and only, spectacular Fraggot. Happily he was with me this morning, though recall we were in the mountains. And we had to be back by the time I had to be at work (we're young, we figured rushing back to our lives wouldn't be hard), but because we were on vacation we forgot about freeking day light savings. And therefore woke up an hour late. With no time for coffee, we dashed to the car, Fraggot carrying all the luggage at once still in his night wear, just pj bottoms (the sight of his muscles carrying that luggage made me forget about any stupid work schedule lol). Jumping in the car, I threw him a shirt and a sweater, and off we dashed. Luckily we had cleaned up and packed the night before.

Driving swiftly down the highway through a small town, we were naturally pulled over by a hick policeman. Explaining to him that we had just vacationed in the mountains and had to be back to our city at a certain time, he began to look at us funnily. "Just you two? On vacation? Together?" At which point Fraggot got very upset looking and said, "Yes, we're gay. Can we please have a ticket or be on our way officer?". The cop gave a grunt, and said, "Oh yes sir you're gettin' a ticket all right". Maybe it was only because we are gay, but I tend to believe it was because Fraggot against my warnings was driving 60 in a 35. After waiting another 20 mins, we were finally back on the road. Rushing again down the interstates. He swerved into my office parking lot just 1 1/2 hours after I was supposed to be there. Gave me a kiss and a slap on the ass and then sped away, probably to go to bed.

Work after all that was a dreadfull, dreadfull disaster, as I was exhausted beyond measure. And then, ontop of all that I had a ton of work. Just one hour's differance in my day made it a living hell.

After work came class, after class came thankfully more time with Fraggot. Then finally came bed. Or... no. Time to write that paper I forgot about. Now, finally at the end of the day I can go to bed after posting my feelings and thoughts. And my feelings are...

To hell with daylight savings and all of its problem making trouble.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Ugh, Being Fit is GAY!!!!

I absolutely wish I was straight right now. Yeah, that's not really true, but let me explain my feelings. I'm not a shallow guy. I don't base relationships on hot bodies and gorgeous features (they don't hurt of course) but a large part of the gay population seems to (NOTE: refering mostly to gays my age of course, people get wiser as they get older it seems). I am slim. But I don't have abs, or really nice pecks, I do have nice legs. And apparently trying to get a lover without abs these days is like trying to get a good job without a college degree. So, I went personal trainer hunting. No, I'm not looking for a lover, I do have Fraggot, and he doesn't care about me having abs (he has enough muscles for the both of us, haha), but still, I want to be prepared if things don't work out with us once he's in Italy.

But I noticed that personal trainers don't look like they do on tv and movies. All the guys I met were about 40 , going bald, and looked rediculously like huge, muscular pigs. If I'm going to be bench pressing with someone standing over my head spotting me, I want to be looking up at a gorgeous man. And then I came to the thought of changing rooms or lockers. Maybe I do need to find a gym full of old, ugly men. I can't see myself acting very polite in a locker room full of young guys in various stages of undress or showering (know that song "Stop and Stare"... yeah).

Well, to wrap this up this is how I ultimately feel on the issue of being fit in the gay community. Do you see how many just ok guys walk around with beautiful women on their arms? Now how often do you see that happening with us queers? Right, like .000001% of the time (usually when the not so hot guy is rich). Ugh! I need to go eat my feelings away!!!

P.S. from Fraggot:

Hey yall, what's up? So, I'm Scott aka Fraggot. So, Jake just ran off to the bathroom and had this up. Only have a minute. Don't really have anything to say, just thought I would piss Jake off lol. LOVE HIM haha, but its fun :P JAKE IS SOOOO GAY!!!!!!!!

Blackberry B&B

So Fraggot surprised me yesterday and told me to pack my things and get ready to leave for 2 nights. So I did and he drove us up to this really nice B&B in the mountains. Therefore I am typing this on my Blackberry (which is none too easy). I think I saw a bear this morning (and I don't mean the big, hairy gay kind). Thing is I don't feel much like playing outside with bears. But we've brought our shotguns along and are going to shoot a couple rounds of skeet today.

Have you ever thought of what it would be like to just leave a city or town and just move into the wilderness? I thought about it for like five seconds before realizing that I would be hours away from a good restaurant, let alone a friendly bar for me and Fraggot. But still it is pretty here and you just sit and spend time with the one you love.

I know this blog is sounding all undramatic and sappy but that's only because I'm on break. I go back to school tomorrow. Yeah we're driving right from the mountains back to school... joy :(

Friday, March 12, 2010

Pretty Things and Shiny Faces

Ok, so I couldn't go to bed yet. Though I should because I have to be up at freeking 6 am on a Saturday (FML much?). But I was on the phone with my friend who lives in NYC, and he was telling me about his new found interest in skin care products.

Alright, lets take a stroll through a little background of me here. Yes, I am gay. No I do not wear make up, wash my hair everyday, spend more than 20 minutes in the bathroom, OR use skin care products (which I'm not knocking, I probably should take more care of my skin). Just want you to get a good mental image here, I am not a typical stereotype of homosexuality that most people have. I like football and beer, just as much as themed dinner parties with green apple martinis (YUM!!).

But here I am talking to my friend about skin care products whilst my boyfriend gives me the most wonderful back massage (Note to all: It is wonderful when you are not muscular but have a muscular boyfriend, he'll give great massages, but doesn't want you to reciprocate with your weak ones). And he is telling me that he just doesn't understand why his face was never shiny before. My mind pauses, and I think, and then tell him that his face was always a little shiny to me, I figured he just had oily skin (or greasy, I can't remember which word I used). Well that just pulled his pony tail. How was I to know that the shiny-ness is something desirable and obtained by banishing the oils from your skin and replacing them with hydrolic vitamin thingies or something like that. Ugh! So, he begins just going off into all these things I don't know nor care to know about skin care. And so I put the phone down and put it on speaker phone. Well, who gets into the conversation, but our one and only Fraggot. Yes! He has been secretly using these skin care products that I knew nothing about. I must say his skin is wonderful. And the two start going off on their own conversation. I love my boyfriend for many reasons, now I can add to it relating to my friends and rescuing me from very gay conversations.

After the conversation Scott (Ok, guess I'm switching around now, keep track, Scott=Fraggot) tells me that I have lots of pretty things. Thanks? I don't know what he means by that. Well, he tells me he likes the art I have. And the antiques I have. And the rug. In generall the decorum of my place. WTF where did this guy come from? He's never told me he like pretty things at all. Ever. Not once. Go antiquing? Him? Never! Apparently that conversation with a real life queen about skin care products just opened up all that repressed gayness inside his pretty little chest. Maybe now I can get him to the gay club. Won't hold my breath :P

Rain and Children

Its sooo wet today. But I love the rain. It freshens everything up and leaves the air feeling clean and crisp. At least in winter and spring here. And along with the rain came a very welcome day of staying indoors with Fraggot, just watching TV and some old movies. Its nice to just be with the one you love, when the rain is softly falling out doors and the wind is whisking by. We saw this very, very cute child on TV. He was adorable. I've always known that I want to have a child, but I had never brought up the topic with Fraggot before. And before I could even say how cute I thought this child was, Fraggot sits up and looks at me and asks, "Do you think you'll ever want a kid?". I decided to play it cool and just shrugged, said maybe, and asked if he did. "Hell yeah I do. I want a boy. I want someone to shoot with, teach to play football and baseball if he wants, and go dirt bikin' with. And, when he gets older I'll always let him use my car for dates with his girlfriends" etc. etc... He went on for like 15 minutes about what all he would do with his son. I don't think I ever realized how much I loved Fraggot before that exact moment. I mean, I knew he was a great guy, I knew that I did love him, but for a few minutes we got past the immature college/frat lifestyles he and I lead, and I got to see him as he could be. I then told him that I really, really do want a child or children. He and I talked for like an hour about how much fun it would be to be dads. And then he looked at me, really seriously, and said, "You know, I really, really, really love you." And the queen in me (which hardly ever comes out) exploded. I started crying, and he started laughing at me. And then he just kissed me, softly, and held my hand. Life sucks though. He's still going to Italy, and I would never ask him not to go, he needs to never regret not going. We've talked about it and we're going to try to do the long distance thing, but that just seems a little too long distance. We've discussed me going over this summer, or him only staying for half of the next school year. We'll have to see how things work out I guess. But I want the whole world to know that I LOVE SCOTT (Fraggot, yeah, I know I haven't used his name yet). Anywho, that's that. Off to bed loves!